Polite to a Fault

Samuel is a nice guy, but that sometimes gets in the way.  He can be too polite, which can be to his detriment.

One example of this happened last week when he did not remind the ward leaders that he needed another food order from the Bishop's Storehouse.  I had noticed that his share of the fridge was looking bare and asked if he had placed another order.  He said that he hadn't and that no one had contacted him about it.  Rather than correct him and tell him to remind them, I simply talked to the Relief Society President and asked if she could check on Samuel.  While she was visiting to complete the order form, she instructed him to remind her when he was due for another trip to the Storehouse.

I think Samuel's lack of speaking up stems from his culture's emphasis on respect.  There have been several times when I've heard Samuel shouting on the phone in one of the three African languages he speaks.  He explained about the most recent occurrence to me and that his younger brother was not showing him proper respect, so he raised his voice.  Apparently, in Samuel's tribe, showing respect has an element of submissiveness and he was displaying his authority by shouting.  I tried to explain to him that in the US, we want respect too, but meekness is not a part of that.

Having an overly polite roommate does make some parts of life easier, but I do worry that when he starts working, he won't be assertive enough.  Hopefully, as he interacts with other people, he'll see the right balance of politeness and assertiveness that will command the right kind of respect.