Too Much

I worked my second job again this Friday, having completed a full-day at RJM.  If I had simply been exhausted I might have done alright, but exhaustion had come and gone by the time I made it to the restaurant.  Even so, I made it through the shift and planned to be there the next morning when they opened.

I got home at almost midnight, so tired I could cry, but unable to sleep for a few hours: when you push your body to be awake beyond what is normal for long enough, it won't just shut off when you tell it to.  Still, I had committed to be there the next morning, so I set my alarm with plans to wake up and get ready to be back when promised.  The last time I looked at the clock, it was nearly three AM.

The next morning at 8:15, the alarm on my cell phone went off.  I got up and turned it off and laid back down, just wanting a couple of minutes before showering.  I remember thinking, "I can't do this," but still pushing myself to get up.

The next thing I remember, I looked at the time on my phone: 1:39 PM.  It took me a few moments to grasp that I had sleep in and missed my first shift (I was going to work a double), but once I was coherent enough to speak, I called the restaurant to explain.  I couldn't get ahold of a manager, even when I called multiple times.

I regret the way that events unfolded, but I do not regret missing work; I clearly needed the sleep.  I was not out of training yet, so the staff weren't relying on me, merely tolerating me, so my absence was manageable.  It was unprofessional skipping work like I did, but in my defense, I did call.

I thought I could handle both jobs, but I failed to consider just how stressful my job at RJM is.  I like the job and I'm happy to have it, but it's demanding and challenging.  Add to that a physically demanding job late at night, and it adds up to be more than I could handle.  It was a hard lesson, but I learned it.  (And don't worry, I plan on going into the restaurant tonight to explain what happened and tell them that I won't be coming back.)  I wish I could say I'll miss it.