After such a stressful week, I said a prayer as I drove home on Friday. I started to have a pretty severe panic attack - thinking about how I lost my source of income due to my conscience when I still have plenty of bills was too much to handle. It was so bad, that I lost the ability to speak, even in prayer. I got the idea that I needed a priesthood blessing and I thought about the Simciks whose house was on the way home. I decided to follow the prompting and went to their home.
When I got there, Lori answered the door (I haven't mentioned before, but Mark and Lori are in their mid-fifties and I think of them as a sort of aunt and uncle to me). In a stuttering voice, I asked if Mark was home. She said he wasn't but asked if there was anything she could help me with. I tried to explain what had happened, but I couldn't make any sense. I was stuttering so bad and pausing so long, it was like I wasn't even talking. It became too much for me and I broke down crying. Lori asked me to have a seat and she got a box of tissues for me. The act of crying was somewhat cathartic and I was able to start talking again. I explained what had happened and why it was so hard for me to deal with. Lori was very kind and just talked with me for a while as I calmed down. She also shared about a difficult time in her life that seemed to be too much at the time, but also helped her become stronger. It really helped to have some empathy from someone that could relate to going through hard times.
We ended up just talking for a while. Feeling much better, I was about to excuse myself to go (I was going to see if I could stop by my home teacher's house to get a blessing) when Mark called to say he was on his way home. Lori briefly told him that I had stopped by to see if I could get a priesthood blessing and that I was still there. Mark asked that I stayed until he got there and he'd be happy to fulfill my request. Mark provided the blessing once he got home, which was exactly what I needed. I still don't know what I'm going to do about all of my bills, but I was promised that it would work out. Then they asked me to join them for dinner and we went to a Korean restaurant.
More than anything else about this situation, I'm happy to know that I have people in my life that I consider friends that are available when I need to talk. It's kind of weird because they're old enough to be my parents (though I'm still older than their oldest child), but it's clear that we're close friends. Just knowing that I have some friends to turn to is worth losing a job over.
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