Taking the good with the bad.

First off, thanks to everyone that fasted this last Sunday. While Allison hasn't found work yet, I'm still confident that it will happen shortly. She has been applying to everywhere in town and I've even been asking around at work if anyone knows of any openings (which did give us some new leads). It's important to not give up.

The Lord has blessed us in a different way. I've made more money this week than I have in a long, long time. That's significant. I work hard, but I also have faith that the Lord will bless me with what we need. A while ago, Allison figured out what I needed to make every day for us to get by. I nearly always make that (which is an increase from when Allison was working).

However, with the additional funds come other challenges. Our SNAP benefits (food stamps) have been revoked. It's really silly because the reason cited was that I make too much money. Since Allison is a full-time student, she's required to work 20 hours a week to qualify for benefits. That's fine, but it also means that I'm the only one on the application. So, I make too much money for one person, but I'm making money for two. This is really frustrating and an additional reason why we need Allison to find work.

I'm doing my best to be patient, and for the most part I am, but I'm still nervous. I know that the fast that so many people participated in has not been ignored by the Lord, but I don't know how much longer we have to wait. Like I said, I'm confident that because of the fast, Allison will soon find work, but . . . will "soon" be soon enough? I pray daily that it will be.

Flossing, The power of

Oral hygiene is important to me, but let's face it: flossing sucks. I mean it's important and everything, but man is it annoying. With the other steps of cleaning my mouth, there are fewer steps. Like brushing my tongue requires only picking up the brush and applying it to my tongue. Similarly with teeth brushing, though the application of paste is required. But flossing, man, it's like its own little process. You've got to pull the floss out, you've got to wrap it around your hand, you've got to get all up in to your grill and wiggle it all about. (Show of hands: who's tired just reading that?)

Here's the thing, though. If I actually floss, I work harder on brushing. My mouth feels cleaner if I floss, but only indirectly so. Maybe it's all the effort of getting all up in there for one step that pushes me to just continue to be all up in there (last time I'll use the phrase "all up in there" this post, promise).

In an attempt to floss more, I bought some floss picks. You know what? It really is easier to floss with picks and I've been flossing every night for over a week now, which means that the rest of my mouth is cleaner, also.

So I guess that means that Allison and I should have corn on the cob for dinner soon. You know, to put flossing to the test. Updates to follow?

Group Math

I've decided that as a waiter, I'd rather have 3 tables with 2 people each than 1 table with 6 people. While it's the same table and would be roughly the same amount of money, there's a threshold for how many people can be present before the ability to do math decreases dramatically. Generally, smaller tables will tip higher than 15%, likely because they aren't interested in figuring out the math and just put down a couple bucks per person. However, if the group exceeds 4 people, I can pretty much count on not getting a good tip. Sometimes I'm proven wrong, but more often than not I won't even get 10% on bigger tables.

But this is just an underlying factor of group situations as a whole. If I'm having talking to someone about politics, it's usually very civil and we can express ourselves honestly without bickering or name-calling. Once we get to larger groups, suddenly all liberals are baby-killing hippies and all conservatives are Bible-thumping rednecks. It's a shame we can't keep the social dynamic of small groups in the larger settings.

The problem is anonymity. With a group, while it's made up of people, it's easy to label "them" as one thing and stop thinking. And it's not just about other groups. People within the group are faceless in a way simply by being in the group. How many times have you been at church and seen someone you only vaguely recognize? And that's at one of the more intimate group settings. I'm not saying that we should know everyone everywhere. Not only would that be incredibly difficult, being lost in the background is okay at times. One thing I miss about Southern California is the acceptance of anonymity, whereas here people feel that they need to get to know everyone. Well, not everyone, but a lot more than I'm used to.

What's my point? I guess just that groups make people stupid. No, that's wrong. Groups can make people stupid. Being part of a group without losing track of who you are can be tough, but it's so important.

So the next time you go out to eat with a group of people and realize the tip is smaller than it should be, don't be stupid.

Bad Music

Have you ever enjoyed something that was mostly good? Mostly likely, since there's little that's perfect in the world. But how mostly good does it have to be to counter-balance the slightly bad? Or, to put it another way, how many swears do there need to be in a song before you quit listening to it?

For me, I've gone through this with a few bands:

• Cake's cover of "I Will Survive"
  "I should've change my [expletive] lock
  I should've made you leave your key"
• Queens of the Stone Age's "Quick and to the Pointless"
  "Oh, baby, baby, please
  [expletive], [grunt]!
• Flobots' "Combat"
  "To get you to bomb back
  Two fisted contact to
  Get the pond packed
  Cause I'm on some [expletive] that exists beyond that"

You get the idea (by the way, I don't listen to those songs anymore). Further, what does a song (or band, even) have to say to be offensive enough to push you away? There's the Spoon song "Jonathan Fisk" where, seemingly randomly, right in the middle of the song, there are the lines, "Religion don't mean a thing / Just another way to right wing." I get that they're frustrated with right wingers using religion as justification for political choices, but the rest of the song is about a bully (Jonathan) that followed the singer home after school. It's just so weird because the offending lines don't fit with the song. I don't like the message of John Lennon's "Imagine," (so I don't listen to it) but at least it's the whole song that pushes the message.

What am I getting at? Swears or other things that are offensive can sometimes be overlooked if they are small enough and the song is good enough. But sometimes the good can't outweigh the bad.

Wives: good cures for hubris.

So, I'm a pretty smart guy. I have a broad field of knowledge from which I pull and do so daily. I also appear to many people to be even smarter than I actually already am (no easy feat) by having a substantial vocabulary.

You know who isn't impressed? Mrs. Larsen. I do not mean this derisively or negatively in any way. It's good for me.

Part of the problem is language. I, like many of my kin, have a good understanding of the English language and can, to use the vernacular, BS my way through a lot. As Plato argued in his dialogues, you don't have to be an expert, just convince your audience you are. I speak directly and confidently, which is roughly 80% of persuasion. Sprinkle in a few facts (like I did when I name-dropped Plato back there), and suddenly you're a scientist*.

But the thing is, I'm not that smart. I'm not a moron (most of the time), but really I probably would land only above average with the population as a whole. I forget this sometimes. When I do, Allison is nice enough to bring me back down to earth.

That is not to say that she doesn't encourage me to do my favorite thing ever (explain), because she totally does. But if I go too far, she'll be there with perspective. For example, if I tell her I made a smart comment in class, she'll congratulate me. If I say that I'm the smartest or that everyone else is stupid (this has happened), she'll remind me that not everyone comments or maybe I understand it better or that I am good at explaining things and not everyone is or maybe this subject isn't their forte and they're only there to fulfill some aspect of their otherwise unrelated major (there was only one other tech writing major in my tech writing class, after all).

Humility can be a tough thing, but if done kindly, wifely correction can be very helpful (and Allison is nearly always very kind).

*A scientist being what most people think of as a brilliant person.

Testing, 123.

I have three tests this week, so no real post today (this one is totally fake and I will deny its existence).

No Complaints.

One of the best talks from the latest General Conference was President Monson's "Attitude of Gratitude," but I've been struggling with his advice. I complain a lot. Even here, on the internet, which we know is supposed to be a place free of negativity. I'm working on it, but still need some work. So today, a list of things that are good/I enjoy:

• I enjoy my History of the English Language class so much that I read my text book for fun.
• Yesterday, Allison asked me to explain what I've learned so far [giggle].
  
• She liked it, too.
  
• The weather has been rather pleasant for over a week.
• Allison and I exercise at the gym together four times a week (it's good and good for you!).
• I've had a great week (in terms of tips) at work.
• Until recently, I've been getting a good amount of sleep.
• I have a fun calling at Church.
• I seem to be doing well in my classes so far.
  

Just like the song says.

Spanish, too.

Allison and I only have one class together this Fall and it's Spanish II. We've both taken Spanish I twice (once solo, once together), so it is nice to at least appear to be nearing our conclusion with the language. However, our teacher likes to focus on topics outside learning the language of Spanish.

For example, we spent the entire class period yesterday talking about the United States' relationship with Cuba. This involved a brief discussion on immigration and wow are people ignorant about immigration. I thought it was bad in So Cal, but these kids were feeling bad for the Cubans, who get automatic amnesty. What about the Guatemalans who work their entire lives to save enough to pay a coyote to take just their kids up to the US to be dropped off in the middle of the Texan desert? Anyway, Allison and I were annoyed that the other students where looking at the subject of immigration as if it were so simple.

What's my point? We were having the discussion in English. How does it help me better understand and speak Spanish if we have a discussion on Cuba/US relations in English? And today, the last ten minutes were spent, I kid you not, naming famous Hispanic athletes. In English.

I want my money back.

Pants

Hey, I'm wearing pants! I haven't done that for months.

Of course, I mean I'm wearing long pants. Jeans, in fact. That means that it's not disgustingly hot outside. Which also means that in a few weeks there'll be snow on the ground.

Still, I'll take the snow over the heat.

OSU must answer for its sins.

There was a Football game last night (in Stillwater, the game of American Football is capitalized). This meant that students (who pay for parking passes), faculty, and staff were not allowed to park on campus after 1pm. My last class on Thursday doesn't even start until 2pm, so class was canceled.

Why would OSU make such a stupid stipulation? Because even though it has Boone-Pickins stadium, which is a very impressive and professionally sized stadium, it has no parking for it. At IHOP, which is about a half-mile from the stadium, the manager had to wait outside to shoo away people trying to park directly in front of the restaurant. OSU demands parking and Stillwater kowtows.

Look, I get that Football will always be apart of college life. And it brings in money that is used in other areas of the University, which is good. For the most part, I've just conceded that Football will be a burden from time to time, but it's just there. However, without the University, there wouldn't be any sports. So, how does it make any sense to have Football at a time that it requires the cancellation of classes (one of Allison's classes was canceled even though it was much earlier in the day to simply avoid the problem altogether)?

On an unrelated note, prescription drug abuse in Oklahoma has more than double in the last 5 years.

Larsen Award

I've decided that as a family, we should have our own award for doing things so totally Larsen-like (because Larseny sounds so illegal). So, if you see someone doing something that is eponymous of this family, give them a Larsen Award.

Example:
I was at a work meeting, going over the new menu the restaurant will be using. It quickly became a session of "Morning Crew Sucks." Since I work one shift a week with the morning crew, I was asked if I noticed a difference between the two crews. I responded by saying, "The difference is palpable." Since no one knew what I had said, I corrected myself and said that I could easily tell the difference between the level of teamwork.

During my next shift, my manager asked me what I meant by "palpable." I said it meant a feeling so strong that you can touch it. He didn't believe me, so I told him to look it up on an online dictionary. He did and my definition was an almost word for word match.

For something like that, I would be eligible for a Larsen Award. Alas, the only rule (I made it up, so I make up the rules) is that you cannot give the award to yourself. However, I have already given the newest Larsen (I don't care what her last name is, she's still a Larsen) a Larsen Award.

Now go and bequeath!